hi!after 2 years finally huh?HAHAHAHA.mannnn I read my last post maigad that's few days before I entering a new life as a diploma student, away from family, gaining new friendsss.ahhhh cepatya masa!and now I am about to entering another level of life!I still cant believe!
So I'm in my last year and last sem diploma!I still have like 2 months before unofficially graduate as diploma student!I'm doing my practical right now somewhere here in telco company in JB.So far its was great except for being super bored cause I dont have any job to do and stress if I cant solve or complete anything they asked HAHAHA.Everyone in the office is very nice to me.Some even so baik tanya kan boss if they can bring me to the site hahaha but the boss didn't allow me ;(
So basically eveything is fine.Its not my first time working in the office so I guess I kind of dah biasa with the situation.
These past few days there's a lot of thing in my mind.I started to recall everything that happened to me dalam masa 2 tahun lebih ni.I'm gaining some friends and even losing some during my life in KL.I really thankful for whatever wrong I did during my schools day because its really effected me.I'm glad i didn't do all the things i did during my school day in this past 2 years.I saw a lot of people/friends doing it and i feel so sad that I cant stops them.I know I should told them that it was wrong you will regret later but haih I cant make myself to do so.
I don't have anyone that I can trust there because everyone that I thought okay slowly changing to be fake or back stabbing me/someone else.I didn't blame them for doing like that or choosing to be like that because i know they just don't realise it yet.Plus I don't have any right to tell them whatever they wanna do with their life.No, I didn't say or tuduh that they are being fake or back stabbing me but I saw myself how they treat others.
I didnt make lots of friend there because you see I'm not freindly HAHAHA.I will just either looking down or try as much as I can to avoid people.I just wait for someone to come to me and tell me they want to be friend with me HAHAHA yes no one come to me except for boys cause you know why.HAHAHA.That included my ex.lmao look beside get some friends , I also got myself a boyfriend and an ex....hahaha
I think that the biggest mistake i ever made.Terima lelaki lain when you know you are not ready with this kind of relationship.Please girl , if you are not ready please dont accept any boy in your life.I feel bad in fact right now i still feel bad for leaving my ex.Dia baik sangat it just that i cant love him with all my heart.i keep comparing him to seomeone he is not and i cant even make myself to share anything with him.Reationship is not just being lovey dovey all the time but also sharing all your life.I decided to leave him because i dont know when will i ready to share my life with him.We started to renggang sebab we dont have anything to talk about.Talking about the same thing made me bored.Plus he is not sweet like shahrir so I started to compare him with shahrir.I know I should not!He was like my friend.Tak ada benda dia buat yang lain dari apa yg my friend did to me.So I don't see any point in our relationship.haih see its not him but I , myself yang salah and jahat.So girls please if you are not ready please dont ever accept any boy.'maybe dia lagi baik?' no unless you dah 100% move on!
Okay back to my life, I did a lot of things that I never did before.I joined some of the program run by college to gain experience in communication and public relation.It was fun.I got to hold walkie talkie and jadi runner VIP phew menggil babe!hahahhaa.I also got to control one event for anak yatim.Do you know its so hard to set up everything and to make sure the program run according to the plan?!huh ofcause I failed to do it AHAHHA.but it was fun because well you see not everyone can do that!hahahaha.
Last year my rommate and I open a booth at our open day college.we sold ice blanded HAHAHA it was my first time had to usaha myself to get money.well ofcouse we ada gaduh sikit because at the same time I jadi ajk for that event so yeah I didnt commit 100% to our business hahaha.but tu first-time lah I rasa ramai orang datang at same time then I have to blend the ice myself hahahaha can u imagine and people keep staring at me doing that.nervous lah oi hahahha.We got quite big lah untung.We decided to spend all the untung watching movie and makan sesedap.well I can say that it is one of the best expeience I get in my life.
Thats a lot of thing I learn and get during my life in KL.I learn , we should not take someone for granted.We also cant trust anyone even you think you are so close with them.Bukannya kena hati hati sepanjang masa but you know lah kan your imit , their limit to you.Try your best to hargai everyone in your life.Yes maybe they are bad to other but that doesnt matter they will do the same to you.for now lah....hahahah but please lah prepare yourself for everything.Harini baik esok kutuk belakang tu normal thing.How they help you and be with you when you susah tu yang penting.Please if you rasa apa yng diaorang buat tu salah u also cannot do that.Jangan buat benda yang kita tak nak orang buat dekat kita.simple.I know sometimes kita tk sedar apa yang kita buat tapi tu lah bila sedar cecepat lah stop doing that.Aku pon selaLu tk sedar apa aku buat tapi bila sedar menyesal sangat and I try my best to avoid doing that again because i know its hurt.Biar orang buat kita ,kita janagn buat orang.
Ada lagi 2 weeks before the new year.Bulan 2 will be my last time dekat KL as a student utm then later I will enter another level of life.I dont wat to cut any relationship I had with them in KL.I hope we still contact and update with each other till forever.Its hurt to see you slowly becaome stranger to seomeone yang dulu kita rapat.Like Haikal and I.Last week on his birthday I sent him satu karangan about how I feel about us.I told him I still remembered everything we did together and how I don't want us to become a stranger just because we are busy with our own life.That's my first time type the whole paragraph with emotion all over me HAHAHAHA.
I cant imagine myself in next level of life.I just hope everything become better, life becomes better, I become better.Till then